Creative Writing (Story beginnings) Essay

A g hoaryen shock encircled the angels head and its torso glowed dazzling clean-living against the drab dreary w exclusively behind.Whats happe she willed her m offh to finis the condemn sole(prenominal) it wouldnt obey so she gave up. She fought too against the stir ability taking her a focusing from the slightly damp pavement but as every ounce of resistance drained out of her limbs, she went limp and was on the whole at its mercy. The final conceit that crossed her mind before it succumbed to the raw cloud that flushtually engulfed her was that she recognised this angel.*Elizabeth Anne Johnson Lizzie to her friends was a beautiful girl. With unending coal black locks flowing down her back and striking features, she go outed straight off a catwalk. Tonight she was wearing her favourite pale pink mini-dress with manicured nails and dainty heels to induce together and with her perfect figure, she was much than able to carry it off. A combination of her stupefy lo oks and the confidence she exuded made every head turn when she walked past a fact of which she was come up aw be.Lizzie had spent all night in Brightons new trendiest nightspot Heaven. The place was heaving with bodies bouncing to the thunder beats pounding out of the state of the art stereo system. They were puppets bounce to the tune of the headph iodin-wearing master in the glass booth above. Fluffy light clouds were suspended from the ceiling, in keeping with the paradisiacal theme, and the strobe lighting faultless the effect.The drinks were flowing and the atmosphere was electric just how Lizzie liked it and as she rank her chocolate- embrown eyes around the dance floor a wave of euphory swept over her. She felt as though she was perched on elapse of the world.Al cony tonight, she had received fifteen requests to buy her a drink a record even by her standards and had accepted only one. This was one more than usual though. She may flummox seemed like the happy-go-l ucky typeface but appearances support be deceptive and she was quite the opposite. Lizzie, a seasoned partygoer, was highly cautious, especially after the lettersNevertheless, against her better judgement, she was drawn in by the hypnotic charms of this blonde-haired stranger and felt forcefulnessless to resist. His eyes were deep pools of bilk blue and he had a passive, peaceful presence she trusted him without delay and completely.She began chatting to him and it suddenly dawned on her that she was telling her life stratum to a summation stranger but she pushed the thought out of her mind just as quickly as it had sur feelingd. Besides with his crisp albumen shirt, squishy vowelise and wide grin, he seemed harmless luxuriant.Chapter superstar (2)The sun was playing cross and seek behind the rows of trees as Detective Flynn drove up to the Heaton mansion. He was filled with the giddy excitement of a man about to smorgasbord his life. He knew how lucky he was to be h ere and that this case could potentially suck in or break his c areer.Flynn was extremely tall and so thin one feared he might blow over in a sudden gust of wind. Through the flaming red curtains flopping over his forehead, anxious blue eyes peered out inquisitively. As the mansion came into view for the prototypical time he was awestruck. Beyond the wrought iron gates, it stood large and hand slightly. It was a huge stone structure with countless windows glinting in the good afternoon sun and set in acres of sprawling grounds, of which every move on was flawless. The only thing blemishing this perfect watercolour was the black and yellow police tape running the length of the building.The old rusty Ford envision coughed and spluttered to a halt in the immaculate courtyard and with an almighty heave up Flynn managed to force the door open. As he stepped out gravel crunched at a lower place his feet. He was dressed in a pair of old cut Marks and Sparks jeans and feeling ar ound, was suddenly pain skilfuly aware of how old and thinned they really were. He was also regretting the rest of his wardrobe choice. His slightly drop shirt had a straight out of the laundry basket look and his black leather loafers hadnt seen a dab of polish sincewell ever.Despite this, John Heaton greeted Flynn with a warm friendly handshake. The twain had been at school together and even though their lives had taken extremely incompatible paths, they had re principal(prenominal)ed the best of friends. As he was universe introduced to Heatons wife Claudia, the police detective couldnt help but notice how much his friend had changed. A nervous and slightly awkward teenager, John Heaton had become a sure-footed self-assured 35 year-old. He now spoke with the eloquence and poise that only a multi-billionaire could. He was dripping with expensive designer labels a far cry from the washed out tee shirts and baggy jeans of his adolescence. silver oozed out of his every pore.O ne thing, heretofore, had definitely not changed. Observing the lackadaisical look that descended upon his face as he gazed at his wife, Flynn could tell his old chum was still a sucker for a pretty girl. And this was one pretty girl 15 years his junior, actress Claudia Gilbert-Heaton was a blonde-haired, blue-eyed beauty. Yet, as she tentatively extended her perfectly manicured hand to shake his, Detective Flynn took an flash disliking to her. Her broad smile was almost condescending and didnt reach her eyes, which were icy and distant.Im so pleased to finally meet you, she said, looking him up and down, staring pointedly at the ink stain on his shirt pocket. The disdainful look in her eyes betrayed her invents and he could tell she was quite the opposite. The reason for this, he would soon discoverChapter One (3)It screamed at me. Its waving arms taunted me as they jerked up and down and the smiley face was more of a sneering face. At that moment all I wanted to do was shatte r it into a thousand pieces but it was so far away and my legs were still weighed down asleep. I picked a involute up sock up off the floor and with all the zippo I could muster, sat up and launched it. It hit its intended destination with welcome thud and mercifully, the screaming desisted.Putting the bright yellow, Little Miss self-restraint alarm clock so far out of reach had been a pre-emptive strike by mother against my Sunday morning lie-in. Ha, I thought, shell have to think of roughlything better than that I managed the beginnings of a triumphant grin before, dim from my exertions, I slumped onto the lumpy mattress and slid back into a peaceful slumber.Ten minutes later I heard the sprightly purposeful pounding that could only be her bounding up the stairs. She burst through the door, wearing her mechanical well-off smile.Morning love, sleep well? Why arent you up yet, I heard the alarm go off ages ago? she asked, ruffling my unruly brown curls. She then(prenominal ) marched over to the window, with unnatural liveliness considering the time and spread the curtains wide.Oh Mum, its too bright, I mumbled in complaint, raising an arm to shield my wooly eyes from the light. She ignored me.I abouttimes think you wouldnt shaft an early morning if it came up and bit you on the behind. Now get up, Im sure youve plenty of work to do straight off and we dont want you falling behind now do we? she chirped, practically, it seemed, in unison with the birds outside.I need sleep, I whined, yearning for some pity. It didnt come.You shouldnt let sleep get in the way of things. Heaven knows I dont I cant. What would take chances if I did? Nothing would get make around here thats what she tutted and continued with renewed vigour, Goodness, look at the state of this room Im sure youve forgotten what colour the carpet is This is not a positive working environment. How on earth can you get whateverthing done in here? She asked and without pausing for an ans wer, delved into the abyss that was my bedroom floor. She began sorting tidying and organising like an unbeatable whirlwind of efficiency, her neat blonde bob bouncing up and down. I hardly lounged on the bed and watched on in amazement. Within minutes she had modify the cluttered chaotic mess into a tidy, orderly bedroom.When she finished, she stood up, brushed some imaginary specks of dirt from her skirt and staring at my sprawled out figure, flashed me the look. Oh no, I groaned inwardly. It was the I-am-so-disappointed-you-didnt-turn-out-more-like-me look. This look was always followed by a stream of criticisms, of which most, to be fair, were ordinarily quite accurate. I sighed and braced myself for the oncoming tirade.Literary Analysis of horizontal surface Beginning (1)When writing my own story opening, I tried to usance techniques that would make the ref want to read on.For example, I depict the main characters appearance in detail so that the lecturer would be able to form a mental point of her. hardly from the first few paragraphs, the ratifier knows that she is a beautiful girl with endless jet black locks and chocolate brown eyes. The effect of this is to make the referee relate to her with empathy rather than objectivity because they feel they know her.I also tried to show her personality was sweet and kind. Her clothes and piazza are powder-pink and dainty. I also mentioned that she seemed like the happy-go-lucky type. I did this so the reader would like her and be affected by anything that may happen to her.I included her full name Elizabeth Anne Johnson so that the reader would feel like they were getting a complete picture of her. However, for the rest of the opening, I referred to her as Lizzie. This pull ind a bond mingled with the reader and the character because she is Lizzie to her friends so the reader feels like her friend.It is written in the tertiary person narrative so the reader can get a full overview of all the ev ents in the story.The narrative structure deviates. This creates suspense, as on that point is no development of the action in the first paragraph in the rest of the opening.I purposely created a huge contrast between the eerie and spooky first paragraph and the rest of the opening, which seems like an familiar night out, by using varying degrees of character and event comment. In the first paragraph I did not use any explanation at all and just apply non-specific terms like she. This was to create mystery and apprehension.In sharp contrast to this, I fully described character and events in the rest of the story. I began with telling the reader her full name so they felt they were being formally introduced. I then went on to describe her appearance, clothes what she is doing tonight she was wearing She had spent all night because I did none of this in the first paragraph.I did however make some relate. For example, in the first paragraph, the pass course angel, uplifting and glowed are employ. In the rest of the opening, the words Heaven, fluffy white clouds and euphoria are employ. This is to create a link between the deuce parts of the story and establish an ongoing theme of heaven and the supernatural.I also utilize a sense of vulnerability to link the two main characters. With the girl in the first paragraph it is obvious. I used carefully chosen vocabulary. She willed her mouthit wouldnt obey shows that she isnt even in control of her own body. She fought to against the uplifting forcewas completely at its mercy, her mindsuccumbed to the black cloud that eventually engulfed her. Also the word succumbed is quite passive.However the vulnerability in Lizzies character is subtler. At the end, she is drawn in by the stranger and feels powerless to resist. This links Lizzie and the girl but also the angel and the stranger because they hold the power in the respective relationships.I think the links make the reader want to read on because its like givi ng them some pieces of a puzzle. They can see some of the picture so they read on so they can find the rest of it.To create but curiosity, the phrase especially after the letters is not explained at any point in the opening, forcing the reader to form their own opinion. The fact that she was extremely cautious especially after the letters makes the letters seem dingy and let the reader know they were a cause for concern. I used ellipsis at the end so show it is an unfinished thought and an unanswered question.I carefully chose vocabulary to foreshadow dramatic events. For example, on top of the world is a well-known phrase, which means in a position of great happiness or success. However I used the phrase perched on top of the world in my story opening. The word perched suggests instability and precariousness so implies that her happiness may be hapless lived.I also used the progression of time to create effect. The story begins with the girl trying to speak and then finally coll apsing she willed her mouth to finish the sentence but it wouldnt obeysuccumbed to the black cloud that was exist to engulf her and then goes to a lively vibrant scene. I did this so the scene would seem like a flashback or a stargaze as we know the main character is unconscious. The strobe lighting in the scene adds to the dream-like quality.I tried to create an image of the setting (the club) being beautiful and pure. I did this by calling it heaven and using description like fluffy white clouds. I then used words like heaving with bodies thundering beats and pounding when describing the people and what they are doing to create a contrast. I did this to imply that clubbing itself is innocent complete but the people make it dangerous.I used alliteration in several places for effect. drab dreary surround emphasises how dull and grey the wall in contrast dazzling white of the angel, to to make it stand out more. In bodies all bouncing to the thundering beat, the b sound is repea ted to try and mirror the beat of the music. I used the phrases bottomless pools of baby blue and passive, peaceful presence because they are quite soft sounds and I wanted to make the stranger seem calm and thusly contrast with the setting, which is electric.I used a metaphor They were puppets spring to the tune of the headphone-wearing master in the glass booth above because it emphasises the implemental nature of the clubbers and the idea of a person wielding power over individual else. The issue of power is explored in many different parts of the story.I also used repetition. The word seemed is used at the end the survive paragraph. She may have seemed like the happy-go-lucky type but appearances can be deceptive and she was quite the opposite and he seemed harmless enough. This is to suggest that just because the stranger seems harmless he may be quite the opposite and to foreshadow him doing something harmful in the future. I border it in italics both times to add emphasi s and draw the readers attention to it.In conclusion, I think the techniques I used were effective because there are unanswered questions right at the beginning, which are never answered and this appeals the curiosity of the reader, making them want to read on.